It's Made Me Think..

We have had a very busy 3 weeks. During those weeks a friend passed away suddenly at the age of 30 who had 5 children under the age of 5. And while I plan to do a full blog post with all the details of the 40 hours of driving I have done, I wrote a letter to a friend tonight that was a hard letter to write. This is ONE LONG LETTER, and if after reading that you dare to venture ahead, I fully invite you to skim.. lots. But really, it's long and very emotional.. let's just say I warned you!


Dear Michael, Natalie, Delaney, Kherrington, Daxton and Parker,

Sharla really worked her way into my life. It wasn't all at once, but a slow progression that was aided by her friendship with my cousin (Leah Richards Bodily), our being in the same ward several times in San Luis Obispo, and my becoming her visiting teacher. She has been a part of my family since I was 2 or 3, but I didn't really get to know her until I was in my teens.

It really all started for me when Sharla got home from the middle east. My Uncle Tom (Tom Richards) called Sharla while I was living with them (I did every summer as I went to college in Arizona) and asked her to speak in church at the singles ward about her experiences in the armed forces. I remember being there for her talk and that she was wearing a white shirt. I remember that she was full of energy and had such a personality! After that I know she and I shared "pleasantries" and became friends on Facebook. We didn't get close, but close enough to want to know what was going on in each others lives. I remember watching through Facebook as Michael and Sharla were married and loving the colors and place that you were married. Then I watched as she became pregnant, then more pregnant, then very pregnant with Natalie. I still remember running into her in downtown SLO one day in about her 8th month asking how on earth she was going to make it one more month! Ha! That's what you get for being single without any children of your own! I was just as big with my first Gianna! I just remember so much from that first pregnancy how much she lived for it. She was so proud to be pregnant and show the world how lucky, happy, in love, etc. she was. I remember how excited I was for you when you went through the temple together. I know it meant so much to Leah to be Sharla's escort. I am so thankful that you are an eternal family.

Fast forward a year or two, I graduated college, moved to SLO and then got married. I think I had so much going on I lost track of everyone at that point! So the next time I really had Sharla in my life was when I got married. I married a guy from SLO (Austin) and we moved into the San Luis Obispo First Ward. I can tell you right now that this was truly the first time Sharla was really on my radar. I know this because I am now starting to feel all of the emotions that I have for her while thinking of how our story progresses. When I moved into the ward I vividly remember Sharla faithfully bearing her testimony every Sunday. And this is where that slow progression for me came in. Her testimonies were always generally about the month before and what she had done, what had happened to her ever growing family, and how it had been impacting her. I can quote her word for word right now from one of her testimonies she gave when Kherrington was just a baby. She got up and said, as Natalie and Delaney were freely running around the chapel as amused on-lookers tried to reel you girls in (and I think Mike you were rocking Kherrington), "I know my kids can get crazy, but that's ok because that's the way I love it. I love them so much". And it was so obvious that she really meant every word. And the fact that her testimonies were never these "churchy" stories and how they were just every day life stories, really showed me just how much her every day life (husband and kids) really meant to her, and how close she was to the Lord to have just regular every day occurrences mean so much to her. I wish I could have realized this then, and not now. I just couldn't understand how she didn't need to have some "amazing" event happen to her to help her testimony grow. It happened for her everyday. She became stronger everyday.

When your family briefly moved to Las Vegas then came back, I was put in as her visiting teacher along with Arya Jones. I knew then and I know now that I was given Sharla specifically by the Lord because I needed to be given her. I needed to learn how to love and serve a fellow sister and he knew that Sharla would be the perfect one to teach me it all. I don't think words will ever express how much I owe to her and love her for all that she taught me, and amazingly continues to teach me to this very day. I know that I will be able to look back in 10 and 20 years and still be able to think of something Sharla did or said that will help me learn from the situation I am in. Even if it's just for a good laugh because I'm having a bad day. She always knew how to pick me right up and focus on the brighter side.

So back to my story. I can't tell you how long I was her visiting teacher, it could have only been 2 years although sometimes it feels like it was 10. It is amazing to me that she had such an amazing impact on my life and she and I were really good friends for such a short amount of time. Your family moved into the town homes on Johnson Ave. that my family had just moved out of when I started visiting her, and I always though it was so funny that of course we could have lived so close. Some key points for me in those years we visited were :

Couponing! Leah really got us into couponing and Sharla took off with it! She was the queen and I think if it hadn't been for her and Leah I never would have had the stock pile I have today!  I love to think of that stock pile and know that even now that she is gone from this mortal world, she is still providing for her family while you need it most.

The Gerber House Party. Leah and Sharla really got into the website Houseparty.com which would select different people to host parties that were based off of certain products. Sharla was selected for the Gerber party and boy did you all go above and beyond. Not only did Sharla stuff our Gerber coolers full of the product they sent her for the party, you had pizza and drinks and so many things for everyone who came. As I packed up to drive from Arizona to San Luis Obispo for the funeral last week, I pulled out my Gerber bag (keeps things cool) and put my ice and drinks in it. It was just so natural for me to grab it as I have used that bag so many times. I will always think of Sharla every time I pick it up.

Babies. Now I know this one is a really broad subject, but Kherrington was born almost exactly 2 months after Gianna (September 18th, 2009). Not only did we have babies very similar in age, Sharla had already gone through the "baby stage" two previous times and always had wisdom (or a funny story) for me for whatever was going on with me and my only child. I came to church about 4 weeks after having had Gianna (and I had lost all of the baby weight for some weird reason.. don't worry I gained it all back shortly ;) and I remember Sharla looking at me and saying "Jen you look amazing for just having had a baby!" It was that simple. She said those few words and she made me feel like a million dollars. I'm sure other people said things to me but it meant the most coming from her. I still can't even tell you why to this day and it really chokes me up! I will never forget her sincerity and the way she made me feel so loved and noticed! She was so loving.

*As a side note to my long story.. I just looked through the blog so that I could find the info I needed for my next point, and can I just say how thankful I am that Sharla kept the blog so faithfully updated. I am amazed how easily I just went through 2 years of posts and didn't get sad, but so happy that those stories are there for us all to enjoy and reminisce over.

Emily Avvalie Mae Prior. When Sharla miscarried this precious spirit our friendship had grown. I loved her and would do whatever I could for her and your family. The whole time I lived in SLO before we moved to Arizona in May of 2011, she called me her "Leah". Because Leah wasn't in SLO yet, she moved to Los Osos right after I moved to Arizona of course! But while Leah could be there for her in spirit and over every form of communication there was, she wasn't in SLO. Which lead to me being her "Leah" while I was there. Leah took care of the emotional "stuff" and I took care of the physical "stuff". I don't know if I had ever talked to Leah so much in my life. And of course it just hits me now, this very moment, that whether Sharla knew it or not (and I bet she did), she was helping Leah and I form the relationship we have now. She is like a sister to me, which is huge because I am an only child. Sharla really helped me grow closer to my own family. I would call Leah almost every time I left your house to tell her how everything was, what was going on, and ask her what else I could do. I remember asking her, ok, find out for me what else I can do. During the first surgery after the miscarriage Natalie and Delaney were already at school, but Kherrington needed a playdate for the day. I can't tell you how excited Gianna was. I remember having to go to Costco with both girls and I got so many comments on how cute they both were. When Sharla went in for the second surgery after the miscarriage, I remember Mike needing to be at school very early that morning. I don't remember if you had a test or what but you called me. Thank you for calling me. So I came over at 5am so you could go to school, then got the girls up eventually to go to their school and I took Kherrington home with me. I remember dropping Kherra off that night with Sharla's mom at the town house and I knew that you all were ok, because there was so much love in your family.
When Sharla found out a couple weeks after, that I had willingly come to your home at 5am she declared we needed a "girls night out". So off we went one night for a promise of pedicures and sushi. It was amazing how much we had in common! We went to Sharla's favorite nail place on Broad right next to Taco Roco in SLO and they knew her and knew she wanted their new massage chairs. Boy did she get a kick out of it when the "butt massager" came on that I was not expecting! Those chairs were something else, and it was just the beginning of such a fun and funny evening! We talked more during our pedicures then I think we ever had talked and I think it was the first time she and I had been together children free! Thanks Mike and Austin for that! We then went to Sumo Sushi (our favorite sushi place in SLO off Broad and Marsh). It was great because we both liked the same rolls and we shared freely. We decided that we needed to get out more often and that this idea of "themed girls nights" was something to catch onto. We had been to an Oriental nail place, then to an Oriental sushi place. Why not add one more Oriental place to that she said. A foot massage place. I had never even heard of them before she told me. I swear as we drove there (I couldn't picture where it was that she was taking me) I thought she was taking me to some "back alley" place. I just had no clue! Well, it turned out to be a very nice place right off of, you guessed it, Broad street and I have returned there several other times since. When we got there it was probably around 8pm and lucky for us we were the only two there. They sit you in these big lounge chairs and start with a back massage while your feet soak in hot water. They put us right next to each other and we were having the greatest time talking. We also had two ladies who were doing our massages who I think we getting a kick out of us as much as we were! Well, I definitely got the stronger of the two ladies because after several minutes she started to twist my arms into pretzels and pull. I don't know what look I had on my face but Sharla couldn't breathe by the time that lady was done with me. She just couldn't get over my face and what that lady was making my arms do! It was the greatest time ever! I never would have done half the things we did that night if it hadn't been for her and I wouldn't have ever had half the fun we had doing them.

The Lord knew that it was time for the "real Leah" to come back into Sharla's life in 2011. I followed your family through Facebook and the blog and saw you all a handful of times during the year, but my time was done. We had moved to Arizona for Austin's school and work and Sharla became pregnant with the twins. The last time I saw Sharla was at my Uncle Tom's 70th birthday party at their house in Los Osos in the very beginning of 2012. She had Parker snuggled closely to her chest in her faithful Ergo and Daxton was still in the NICU. It was so apparent how much she cared for you both Parker and Daxton, she was so thankful to have Parker close to her but still so aware that Daxton was not with her. I followed her struggles and triumphs with the twins throughout the pregnancy and delivery, and all I can think of is how hard she worked to bring you boys into this world. She was so proud to not only give Mike a son, but to give him two sons. I laughed when I went through the blog and saw that she had written "Here I am pregnant with Scarlett and Layla." She already had the girl names picked out, Layla Brielle Marie Prior and Scarlett Avaylee Mae Prior.

When I learned of Sharla's passing, I was on a family vacation in San Diego. Leah texted me at 7am that morning to call her when I woke up. All I have been able to think about since are Natalie, Delaney, Kherrington, Parker and Daxton. I know that Sharla is in a good place where she is free from the health issues and miseries of this world. I know that while Mike is having to go through this unbelievably hard time, he knows that they are an eternal family and WILL be together again. I want the 5 of you to know how full of life your mother is. She was such a unique spirit and touched every life she passed no matter how small or large the interaction was. She touched my life. I will always have so many memories of her, and memories of so many different kinds. The good, the bad, the funny, but no matter what those memories are, I can feel her strength through each and every one of them. I hope that each and every one of you will have at least one memory of her that is yours, and yours alone. But even if you don't have that, I hope it can give you the peace to know that she has been apart of so many lives and she gave you all every minute of her life that she could. You were her life, and she loved you with everything. I hope that in the time my husband and I have together that we will grow to have the love that Mike and Sharla had for one another. You were so right when you said that what you and Sharla had in 7 years was more than what others may ever have in a lifetime. Please be strong for one another, for in each of you, you will find a piece of her that she left behind, and if you put those six pieces together you will have Sharla. I know this is the utmost truth and that she would want you all to stay together and stay strong.

I am so thankful for the impact Sharla has had on my life and the many blessings she was always silently giving me as I learned to love and serve her as the Lord would have me do.

I love you all,

Jennifer Jensen